


Gon and the comically large spoon

by catboyschezo



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Disasters, Other, Spoons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:53:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25229398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catboyschezo/pseuds/catboyschezo
Summary: "Bro, can I get some ice cream?" Gon requests."Sure, but only a spoonful." Killua answers.Gon pulls out a spoon. Not a normal spoon though. This one is quite gigantuan in size. Its fucking huge. It struggles to fit in his palm. It's a comically large spoon.All hell ensues.Warning: incredibly OOC
Comments: 5
Kudos: 15





	Gon and the comically large spoon

**Author's Note:**

> Im so fucking sorry

"Bro, can I get some ice cream?" Gon requests.  
"Sure, but only a spoonful." Killua answers.  
Gon pulls out a spoon. Not a normal spoon though. This one is quite gigantuan in size. Its fucking huge. It struggles to fit in his palm. It's a comically large spoon.  
"Where the hell did that come from!?" Killua stares in awe at the huge spoon. He wonders how that will even fit in the small carton of ice cream.

Gon's face lights up into a smile. "I actually bought it with my hunter's liscense!" He says.   
"You dumbass. Why'd you spend your money on something so useless?" Killua raises a hand, preparing to hit Gon.  
"It's not useless! I'm using it right now!" Gon used the spoon to block Killuas hit.   
Suddenly, Hisoka burst through a window, glass breaking and scattering all over the floor. A few pieces of glass are stuck in his skin but he's Hisoka, he probably gets off to that shit. "Oh my...such a large spoon. It looks perfect for sparring...I think in fact I'm starting to get turned on..." He grins. "Oh hell no!" Killua grabs gon, the green haired boy still holding the spoon, and runs into the nearest room. He locks the door. 

Kurapika just happens to be in the room they entered. "Gon? Killua? what are you doing in here?"   
Killua looked at Kurapika with a fearful look. "Gon bought a comically large spoon, Hisoka saw it and popped a boner."   
Kurapika froze and looked done with everyone's shit. suddenly Hisoka started banging on the door. "You can't hide forever!~" He exclaimed. "We need to find another way out." Kurapika suggested. "It's gonna be okay spoony!!" Gon clutched his comically large spoon in his hands, almost as if he was guarding it with his life. "Gon, pry open the window with your spoon!" Killua yelled. The banging on the door became louder. 

Gon complied. "Okay fine, I'll use it just once." He angled his spoon into the perfect position. The window cracked open, making just enough space for the three boys to escape. Hisoka broke into the room just as they had left it. "Oh no, they must have exited through the window..." He had arousal and dissapointment in his voice. "Guess I'll have to leave that way as well." He Attempted to squeeze through the window crack, but alas, his asscheeks were so fat he struggled to fit through. He couldnt leave and due to his acessive amount of cake he was stuck there. "Oh no! My cake has prevented me from finding those three." He decided to stay there until he could figure out a way to escape his pane-ful fate ;D. 

The gang eventually runs into Leorio.  
"Gon? Killua? Kurapika? What happened?"  
"Hisoka is tracking us down."  
"Ah."  
"And why's that?" He asks.  
Killua pushed Gon to the front, the green goblin still clutching his huge spoon.  
"The spoon. That's why."  
Leorio observes the spoon for a second.   
"Maybe we should sacrifice the spoon to prevent further harm?"   
Gon gasped. "No! We cant hurt Spoony! He didn't do anything!" Gon teared up.  
Killua slapped Gon. "Gon! It's a spoon! It's not sentient!"  
While the two were distracted arguing, Leorio took the spoon and snapped it in half like a twig. Blood immediately splattered the premises. Gon's face froze and he compulsively began crying like a toddler. The bloodstained group were all frozen. Why the fuck did a spoon contain blood. What the hell just happened. Did it have organs??? What. Why. I....

Suddenly the spoon lord arose from his silvery grave and set the world ablaze. The end. I have no fucking idea what to write.


End file.
